The Real Reason People Hate Erotica 

No silly post  today,  just me, in bed at 7am,  thinking about all the shit I write that few will ever read. I’m actually fine with that, believe it or not. When I was younger,  I harbored the delusion that ONE day, I would find my place and my people,  who would validate my unique weirdness , and we’d all frolic together, like that little bee girl in the Blind Melon video.  And, I have, sort of, but the older I get, the more I realize that it’s not even about that.

Even the people who get you won’t get everything. The true test of friendship is when you go off the map, and the ones who love you try to follow,even though the trail you’re leading them down seems dubious, at best. The true test of yourself is in how far you’re willing to keep going down that trail as the ones who are willing to follow drop down to the single digits.

But I digress .

Why DO so many people hate erotica? I think partly, it’s because a lot of the writing is utter crap.  The plot, if there is one at all, pretty much revolves around boring,  non-dimensional characters trying to find love and/or mind blowing orgasms in spite of some contrived obstacles and a villain who really could have been efficiently dealt with from the beginning,  if only the heroes of the story had shown any amount of foresight whatsoever.  But then, all of that seems to be true of most of the things we consider entertainment. It goes deeper.

LOT’S of people are really uncomfortable about sex. Sex isn’t the be all and end all, necessarily, but God damn. It baffles me that so many adults, who are presumably having sex and liking it, just cannot bring themselves to talk about it, let alone read about it.

Here’s why that bothers me- a lot of my friends have reached the stage in life where they’ve been with their significant others for a while, and I’m hearing  countless complaints about their lack of connection with their partners.  The sex is mediocre, if there IS still sex at all.  Many of them are having affairs,  or have had in the past, and it’s not because they stopped loving their partners. In fact,  it’s usually the opposite; they feel compelled to seek the fulfillment that they’re not receiving at home, due to, I think,  two main things-lack of communication and lack of good sex, and those two things are irrevocably intertwined.

And this is the part where someone cries foul, because my words hit them below the belt,  and they feel compelled to cry, “sex  isn’t everything!!!” No, it isn’t,  but it’s more important than most people give it credit for. If it wasn’t the whole gay marriage issue wouldn’t even be a thing .

The truth is, no one really gives a damn whether two men or women,  or however they identify, want to cohabitate and build a life together,  but the very IDEA that one guy might stick his dick in another guy’s ass, and that they both may actually LIKE it, is really just more than some people can handle. And heaven forbid that some woman might leave her husband because the lesbian next door eats pussy when he won’t. That’s just a recipe for total anarchy. Because of this, most major religions revolve around telling us when, where, and who we can fuck.

I don’t blame religion, or God, though. Religion just gives some people refuge from their own accountability,  even though,  again,  that’s not even what it’s about, and the most cowardly of those try to force their fear-based ideologies on others.  I truly believe that if there is a God, he’s really not that concerned over your curiosity about how having a dick in your ass might feel. There are, after all, far more pressing things to deal with.

So, don’t go blaming God for the shit you don’t want to deal with.  A truly loving parent understands that the only way for his children to mature into proper adults is to make their own way through trial and error. Your friends and family might not get it, but they have their own rows to hoe.  Don’t let their shit become your shit.

And ya know,  sexual awkenings aren’t for everyone.  Some people just truly aren’t interested in sex one way or the other, and that’s okay too. Just,  if you feel like there’s more to this sex thing than you know, explore it. When your inner prude throws up a big wall of NOPE!, don’t be afraid to climb that rickety bitch and see what’s on the other side. As long as everyone is a consenting adult, then there truly can be no wrong there. 


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